Thursday, 23 June 2022

Blitz mood

Shadows are coming 
rumbling under clouds
Like insidious blitz artillery 
Aimed 
 at my invidious existence 
When the grief flows thick 
and razor under my skin
And I brooding
Bleed Bloody and thunder thoughts
Brewing foul teas and potions.
Looking at others happiness 
And deeply grieve 
Stewing resentment at
my loses
The big guns of envy blast
A half beating beaten heart
I Have wounded me with
Myself
The wreck of my attachment  
I must be my own surgeon 
And counsellor and priest and lover.
I Elder me myself 
I am from the  gutter
I will not surrender 
but 
Rage at the alter of a long dead god.
Rebirthed in every second 
In my breath and tears 
Every shudder and shiver 
In utter defiance 
It is in every syllable 
I utter and the silence I mother.

Wednesday, 22 June 2022

Mother

Shadows coming 
rumbling under clouds
Like insidious blitz artillery 
Aimed 
 at my invidious existence 
When the grief flows thick 
and razor under my skin
And I brooding
Bleed Bloody and thunder thoughts
Brewing foul teas and potions.
Looking at others happiness 
And deeply grieve 
Stewing resentment at
my loses
The big guns of envy blast
A half beating beaten heart
I Have wounded me with
Myself
The wreck of my attachment  
I must be my own surgeon 
And counsellor and priest and lover.
I Elder me myself 
I am from the  gutter
I will not surrender 
but 
Rage at the alter of a long dead god.
Rebirthed in every second 
In my breath and tears 
Every shudder and shiver 
In utter defiance 
It is in every syllable 
I utter and the silence I mother.

Thursday, 26 May 2022

Love song

I cannot tell my tongue 
to tell you
How you are all 
my meaning
my sounding depth  
in a shallow world 
of shallow things
you are all and everything 

I try to articulate 
what you mean to me 
but instead gesticulate the geometry
of the space you occupy 
in my heart
chalice of my thoughts

Here the connection we share
Is rare raw and conscious 
Like a jewel
from some Kipling East.
Jungle glowing. And
The world Disrobes us
to the skin
To be close as close can be
We feel the surface of the seeming
Dreaming world ever closer
explore the inner fleeting
At the depth of being
Where time slips away day to day
Evening by evening
Breath by breath 
Hour by hour 
Each kiss closer to forever.

Sail

Time is my Ocean

In my mind I sail 

the salt horizon 

I am a ship of wishful

Thinking.

Distant Clouds drift

On floating Sea 

Ethereal shades of blue

Sinking 

Lift the 

Shimmering light

Layer on layer of shattered

Sparkling flicker washed

In a dream

Of you and 

I at the helm call

as you pass

Out of sight

Out of reach

Opaque beauty  

Of breaking wave

Foam flung high

To splash the deck.

You are as a song lost

In rig and canvas

A tune I heard once

Sung to me enraptured 


A fading connection 

My boat a speck far out


A lone gull tracking

A wilderness of memories 

Tuesday, 19 April 2022

WH

Modern War is so passé, so virtual
 A mobile phone is videoing a man
 The digital is not the actual
A binary weapon  kills as kills can

A coat is crawling into a drain
A block of flats falls, people run
A child’s coffin pushed on a train
A drone hunting some mothers son

what has this world become?
The psychotic ape has won
Another reality has sprung
Where Nobody fires the gun

 The map is not the Terrain 
As they scream 
In real pain
Yemen, Sierra, Ukraine.

Saturday, 2 April 2022

Stage

Don’t make  me leave my garden 
Don’t take me back to town
Don’t tell me of the  perfect
Gods own -
Living the dream
Party people
Up there on the stage
Let me rage!
My life may have been
drifting 
one foot at a time lifting,
Looking for a mother
 in every woman’s eyes.
Believing my own lies.

But I broke my class 
broke my chains 
Burst my jacket 
Bust my balls
Made a sacred stage 
Out of an iron cage.
Ex catholic ex chaos
 I believe as I see 
death cult priests
For whom I don’t exist.
 Yet for every sin of me
Some small part is free

I run spirit native
I was born 
Liberated
I have always felt so free
Of mind if not in body.

My world the stage 
holds no fear for me 
my imagined paradise
Mothered me

Leave me in my garden of illusion 
Don’t make me go away
I’ll fuck me up in my own way.

Friday, 4 February 2022

Ca Ching 2

You and I watched
 Tiger Bay set into the sun
Let it sink into the sea.
Have I always been here
On this evening shore 
Holding farewell hands
with you
I thought but said
God is long time dead in me 
I am not of the chosen few,
I am my own weakness
My own dim light 
my own shadow blocks my view

Looking down 
You sighed, 
All things must fall 
The bottom must drop out
The whole cannot be 
you thought but said
Ahh my dear 
My tea’s gone cold.

Reality is too short to kiss I thought
But said instead
Do you believe there is 
anything that can truly set you free?
You answered, obviously 
I live in hope and you?
I looked inside myself 
and left
sitting hopefully too.

Experience once

The flower cracks  the seed That grows the bud  And the smallest atomised grain blooms the maths of things  Joy love, fear and pain  the equ...